Are You in So Much Pain You Can't See
the Right Next Step?
The Marital Inventory™ will give you clarity on where you are today, how you got here, and what your next steps should be.
You don't have to decide
your whole future today.
A Personal Message From Jonathan
Here’s what I’ve learned after helping couples for over a decade. Before you try to fix your marriage… you need to understand what’s happening.
Most couples begin by asking “How do we fix this?” But that’s the wrong first question. You have to start with “What is actually happening here?”
You see, pain clouds judgment. Conflict will narrow your perspective. And fear pushes you toward decisions that you may regret later.
That’s why The Marital Inventory wasn’t designed to fix your marriage. It was designed to help you understand it – where you are today, how you got here, and what your options are for moving forward.
Because clarity almost always comes before good decisions. You need calm, objective understanding first, and solutions later.
In solutions and strength,
If any of this sounds familiar:
- You don’t know what else to do.
- You’re exhausted from trying to make things better.
- You keep repeating the same arguments.
- One of you is pulling away, the other keeps trying harder.
- You don’t know if your marriage is actually worse, or you’re just exhausted
The Marital Inventory was created to give you clarity – because you can’t make wise decisions when you’re overwhelmed by fatigue, frustration, or uncertainty.
Get Clarity About Your Relationship
Get Honest
Where are we?
See your relationship as it really is—not as you wish it were or fear it has become.
You’ll identify what’s hurting, what’s still working, and where hope still exists.
Take Ownership
How did we get here?
Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with my spouse?”
you’ll begin asking, “What have I contributed—and what can I change?”
Because responsibility creates influence.
Choose Your Direction
What happens next?
Not your whole forever.
Just your next right step.
Whether that’s rebuilding your marriage, seeking support, or simply having the conversation you’ve been avoiding, you’ll finish with clarity instead of confusion.
This guided assessment helps you get clarity before you try to make decisions
You can’t expect therapy to work, or random tips from Instagram to have a long-lasting impact, if you don’t know what’s really going on in your relationship.
You need to pause, take stock, and get honest with yourself and your partner if you ever want to move forward – no matter what that looks like.
Most couples don’t actually know what’s wrong. They know what they’re fighting about. But they don’t understand what’s happening underneath the fighting.
The Marital Inventory helps you uncover:
- the patterns keeping you stuck
- the wounds driving your reactions
- the expectations creating disappointment
- the habits strengthening—or weakening—your emotional connection
Jonathan Van Viegen is a renowned couples therapist + coach with a unique perspective.
He has helped thousands of couples rebuild trust, strengthen communication, and reconnect after seasons of conflict and distance. An expert psychotherapist known for his deep understanding of what actually helps relationships heal, and the author of Choosing Us, Jonathan knows that marriages are transformed when two imperfect people learn how to choose each other again.
- Over 10 years helping thousands of couples strengthen their relationships
- Millions reached through practical relationship education online
- Author of Choosing Us and creator of the Chosen & Cherished Method™
A Guided Relationship Assessment
Built Around Three Conversations
Instead of overwhelming you with theory, The Marital Inventory walks you through a series of carefully designed exercises that help you see your relationship from a completely different perspective.
Inside you’ll explore:
Relationship Snapshot
Understand where your marriage truly stands today—not five years ago, not where you hope it is, but where it is now.
Patterns & Ownership
Recognize the habits, expectations, conflict cycles, identity wounds that shaping your relationship more than you realize.
Choosing Your Direction
Clarify the next step that’s right for your marriage—and create a practical plan to begin moving forward.
Your Choosing Us Summary
Finish with a personalized roadmap summarizing where you are, how you got here, what you own, and what comes next.
Emotional Connection Spectrum
Identify where your relationship feels connected, lonely, hopeful, stuck, safe, fragile, and more.
Ready for clarity?
Start The Marital Inventory Today
What Couples Say About
Jonathan's Approach
Stories from couples who chose repair over resentment, connection over conflict, and each other as they built their Enlightened Marriage.
You Don't Need To Decide Your Whole Future Today.
You only need to decide your next step.
If your marriage feels confusing…
if you’re overwhelmed…
or if you’ve simply stopped knowing what to do…
slow down.
Tell the truth.
Understand what’s really happening.
Because clarity changes everything.
Questions You May Have
Can I complete this by myself?
What if my spouse refuses to participate?
Is this therapy?
No.
This is an educational workbook and video training designed to help you understand your relationship more clearly.
What if we're considering separation?
How long does it take?
Most couples complete it in about an hour, though many choose to spread it over several conversations.